Well 2017 is just a few days away from being over , I can’t believe how fast this year has been and at the same time it has had a lot of eventful happenings both Good and bad . And here we are the last month if the year and we thank The Almighty for bringing us this far.
Beginning of this month I was at a friend’s event and the talk was about gratitude and she passed around blank sheets of paper and asked us to write what we’re grateful for this year. When I took that Shit of paper I realized I had a lot to write so I might just share with you guys what I had in mind and I mean all of it or maybe just some of it .
At the start of this year I had really high hopes, expectations and plans… But like they say when we make plans God laughs right. Well mine He must have just laughed as well because none of that happened. In fact what happened was never in my plans, all I did make was decisions that I wasn’t proud of, well regrets and consequences came as an icing on the cake, I had to watch things unfold simply because you have no control over them…at times that’s how powerless we are at some situations .
In second thought I realized I was being selfish and blind at the same time. Selfish because I couldn’t see that there are those who have had it worse this year. Those who have lost their lives or their loved ones due to this year’s elections , road carnage, diseases, unknown causes, long term illnesses. Those who lost jobs and couldn’t continue taking care of their families. Those whose businesses went down because of economic issues. But here I am breathing, healthy as ever, smiling and every loved one of mine alive and healthy…what more do I need really? I’m not saying I haven’t gotten my fare share of the squabbles 2017 distributed but it wasn’t as bad and I’m sure for most of us it’s the same so shouldn’t we atleast be grateful??
I was blind as well to only focus on physical,financial, and outwardly seen growth forgetting that growth needs to start from within and surprising enough a lot of that has happened this year. I have learnt to wear my big girl pants on and keep them on. Even this year I remember my mom telling me ” eeh na naona umegrow” and I know she didn’t mean physically because we all know I haven’t 😂😂..But she said that in relation to an action I had just done….and trust me that night I went to bed with my ego massaged haha . I realised I wasn’t a kid anymore. I had to start adulting , sleeping less, playing less blame games and instead own up to my actions, not dwelling in the wrong decisions I make but focusing on rectifying them, taking care of myself more often .
I am no longer afraid of the unknown like before because I know better with God by my side. My growth started with God, I decided I don’t want to be the Luke warm kinda friend with Him. My daily prayer is that our relationship grows each day….not that kind of person that runs to God only when I have a problem or when something good happens in my life, not that kind of person that has just for the sake prayers . And true enough when you take a step closer to Him it’s like He takes five steps closer to you because most conversations I have I do them alone and that means with God around at the end of the day there’s this sort of relief you get. He made me have strength to wear those big girl pants . I stood up for myself when needed be , even if it meant I had to sound persistent or needy, I cut people off when necessary, I had conversations that I had been shying away from just to get a clearer view of things, I took steps I had never imagined I would take. I learned to look out more for myself and not live for others , to be happy for myself and others as well, to be open minded , to try new things, to let go let God. But among all these I did make mistakes no doubt some we’re really big …But I am my mistakes…if you erase your mistakes you will no longer exist you Will erase yourself. Learn to live a life free of regrets??
In short what I’m saying loves is , first life is much easier with God try to make Him more involved in your life, rant to Him he listens, have honest conversations with him he knows what’s in your heart but just wants you to come clean to Him. Secondly love more , yes not everyone will reciprocate but you do you and let nature take its course. Doing something good for yourself and others gives you this inner peace that no one else can. There is joy in giving be it love ,care, a smile, or even just a greeting. And lastly be grateful. A grateful heart is a magnet of miracles . Take a 360 degrees in your year’s happenings, I’m sure there are memories worth keeping, even if it was ten months ago it’s still a memory…because in my experience there’s no such things as a long time ago but just memories that mean something and those that don’t..those that bring pain just let them be a lesson and shove them at the back of your mind. Pick the good and leave behind the bad. Those little mercies be grateful for them, acknowledge them thank God for them. We’re so much focusing on what we don’t have asking ourselves why it’s taking too long but the thing is maybe it’s because we are focusing on its absence and not it’s presence. Appreciate what you have and you will be blessed with more, those little tasks that God is giving you is a preparation for something big just Trust The Process . You have reached this far so imagine the far you are going and just fasten that seatbelt and enjoy the ride life is a journey just go with the flow .
Keep God by your side and watch yourself Grow and Glow all 2018
Keep Praying having Patience and see how much progress you’ll achieve.
I wish you all a blessed 2018 loves.
From my ❤ to yours.